Hey yall! It's Missydoll!
I wanted to take the time to share my journey from Fat to FFAB with you because I think so many other women/moms especially can relate. If others are able to see I could overcome and succeed they then hopefully will realize they can too! Let me start by giving a little background on myself. I'm a 39 year old mom of two who has transformed not only my life through health and fitness but also the lives of my family. I have always been on the petite and thin side but as I began adulthood I started slowly gaining weight from lack of exercise and poor eating habits. I yo-yo dieted off and on for as long as I can remember. I'd loose ten and gain back twelve. Through the years I "dieted" myself to almost 200 lbs and the beginning stage of obesity, with most of my weight coming on after having my children. This vicious cycle continued up until Jan 2012 when finally I knew I was ready to get serious and get my life back. As I started my journey I knew that I needed to not only adopt healthier choices and implement exercise...I also needed to figure out why I ate the way I did...was it just emotional eating, stress, just because I enjoy food? I needed to take a long look at myself and find the reason so that I could finally address it and not fall back into the same pattern I always had.
I knew most of my habits came from just being a busy mom. I had two little ones...so I ate leftover lunches and dinners they left behind so not to waste...I ate whenever I had time and usually it would be late at night once everyone was sleeping bc that became my only alone and quiet time. I knew that I was letting myself go because all I cared about was being a perfect wife and mother and having a perfect spotless home. I ran myself ragged trying to do it all and before I knew it I honestly did not recognize the person looking back at me in the mirror anymore. How did I go from being a pageant queen who was dressed and done up everywhere I went to this frumpy, overweight mom that wore her husbands tee shirts and same black yoga pants every day because nothing else fit? How??? How could I allow myself to become this way? I lost who I was trying to be everything to everyone and neglecting myself, my own health to do so. Some of my binges I know stemmed from grief. I ate the hurt of loosing two pregnancies, loosing my beautiful mother at only 48 years old to Leukemia and then loosing my youngest sister in a fatal car accident a week before her 23rd birthday. I didn't have time to deal with all of that hurt and grief because I had to be what everyone else needed so I ate it instead and kept pushing it as far down as I could literally swallow it. I cringe when I think about the time...the life I have wasted. All of the occasions and invites I didn't take part in just from the sheer embarrassment of how fat I was. The little birthday invitations I quickly trashed before the kids saw them so I wouldn't have to go, the times sitting in my closet crying because nothing fit and I was nothing short of miserable. The times I sat back and didn't participate in life period because of how ashamed I was to be seen. The fact that as hard as I tried to be a perfect mom...I was actually cheating my sweet babies out of the mom I really could of been if I were healthier and fit. The chance I was taking with my health and the possibility that if I hadn't finally changed my life I may not always be there for my kids. Jan 2012...I finally had that "I'm done" moment and this time it was different than all the rest. I knew I had to figure out how to get the weight off once and for all bc I knew I could not go on the way I was. I was so fatigued, not feeling well and I had numerous other symptoms so I went in to see my doctor for lab work just to see what was going on. My labs were awful...my vitamin D alone was at the level of an elderly person. My cholesterol and triglycerides were really high and I was soon going to need medication to reverse all the damage my poor lifestyle choices had caused.
Listen I know it's easy to say "I can't do it" or "I don't have time" or "I'm tired" or whatever excuse sounds good at the time and I know personally there are a million because I've used them all BUT we've got one shot at this life and whether or not you realize it the time passes anyway so you might as well suck it up and make the best out of living it while you can! This journey for me has ultimately been far more than the weight I've lost and more about the life I've gained! I never in a million years would of dreamed I'd be chosen to represent an athletic apparel company based on my ability to inspire others! Like what???!!! I never imagined people would use me as their motivation but with that humbling reality comes a responsibility to not only myself but to those I inspire to keep on keeping on.
Never sell yourself short...don't wait on others to believe in you...you believe in yourself! It truly is not a question of "Can I?" It's all about "Will I?" Only you can answer that and that decision is a true measure of whether or not you want it bad enough.
Xoxo Missydoll! Follow more of my journey on Instagram! @BWC4ME
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